The swing of things

We’ve been married for two months now, and making love is still really painful.

I had a small surgery 5 days ago, in which they discovered (in a quantifiable way), that I have endometriosis. In a twisted way, this gives me hope. I know that some of the pain will go away once I have the second surgery to remove the endometriosis. But I’m know that isn’t the entire picture.

No matter how many people warned me that the first year of marriage would be hard, it is human nature to believe that my marriage will be different. And there is a certain type of pressure that comes when you marry young. Most of your friends have no idea what marriage is actually like and assume, like I assumed, that it would be full of relaxing time together and lots of great sex. So it can be really tough when it is so much more complicated than that. It is very tempting to see myself as a failure. I know, in my head, that I am not. But how do I keep that attitude in my heart?

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